Ziggy Two Step - Courier Extraordinaire Read online

No time to wait for the elevator. It’s time to two-step it up two flights of stairs. Ziggy leaves

  the stairwell and finds himself on the 3rd floor but isn’t sure where to go from there. He

  decides maybe he should head down to where the loud moaning was coming from. Whatever

  happened to highway direction signs? Every hospital should have ‘em. As luck would have it

  Two Step found himself in an operating room where a patient was lying on a table with the

  surgeon leaning over him and one hand stretched out at his side as if he was expecting

  something. Oh yeah ... right ... the kidney !!! Ziggy tossed the kidney over in a lateral motion

  that even Dan Marino would be proud of. He didn’t even bother to get a signature. Ziggy was

  no fool; it was obvious the surgeon was busy at the moment.

  Upon leaving the hospital, Ziggy heard the approach of ambulances but he didn’t have time to

  hang around. He still wanted to do one more delivery and then take a break. Just moments

  after he left, three ambulances came roaring in to discharge three persons who had been

  involved in automobile accidents. It was becoming a very busy day in Riverton.

  One More Drop and It’s Break-time Again !!!

  Only down two blocks from the hospital was the video store. A sign on the door said to drop

  off videos in the slot below. Since the package said it contained videos, that’s precisely what

  Ziggy did and then back to the office he went.

  Back to the Office - Another Coffee and More TV

  Ah, a cup of java this time and a few minutes to scan the boob tube. Breaking News on

  Channel 8. There was a three car pile-up at the intersection of Hollywood and Vine. Two dead

  and two taken to hospital with serious injuries. Also, just one block away, there was a van

  which crashed into the window-front of Duffy’s Tavern injuring an underage youth who had

  been drinking there. Police were called to the scene in order to keep calm among the

  throngs of people who appeared to be thoroughly intoxicated. Ziggy couldn’t believe it.

  Nothing like this ever happens in this town. Wonder why? If there’s that many bad drivers

  around, City Council should do something about it.

  Time to Finish the Deliveries and Call It a Day

  The last batch of deliveries was going to be easy. They were all within City Central. Ziggy

  parked his bike, grabbed five packages and some envelopes which were all destined to

  businesses inside RPC - The Riverton Professional Centre, and off he went. Another building

  that had an entrance 12 steps above the sidewalk. A lot of older town folk griped because

  there were too many businesses like that in town but not Ziggy Two Step. He just twostepped

  it all the way up to the front door - zigged a little, zagged a little but nobody got in

  his way. Nothing delayed him and that’s a good thing as time is money !!! 28 minutes later

  and Ziggy had delivered all his items and just had a few left to go. One of them was a golf

  club .... why on earth would someone ...oh heck, doesn’t matter... it still needs to be

  delivered. Ziggy had strapped it on the back of his bike so it wouldn’t damage any of the

  other items he was carrying.

  Two blocks further away, Ziggy had to wind his way through the Farmers’ Market to reach his

  other drop offs. He had to slow up more than he would have liked because of all the people

  shopping for the finest fruits and veggies Riverton had to offer. 22 minutes later he had

  dropped off all his packages and was even able to make a doctor’s appointment on one of his

  stops. Little did he realize that as he wound his way though the Farmers’ Market, the handle

  of the golf club hooked the awning of Colonel Sander’s Live Chickens. The awning came

  crashing down on the cages containing the chickens and there were chickens flapping and

  running all over the place. The younger and quicker shoppers were able to get themselves

  supper at a fraction of the regular price much to the chagrin of the Colonel.

  Ziggy’s First Evening Off

  Ziggy arrived home just after 4 PM. Moma had dinner in the oven.

  “What’s for supper, Mom”

  “Chicken. Got a real good deal in the Market today. How was your first day at work?”

  “Pretty good but a little boring compared to what’s been going on around town today. Some

  old lady got robbed and there were two accidents. But the real cool part was I got to deliver

  a live kidney just before a patient croaked. The surgeon had his hand out waiting for it when I

  arrived.”

  “That’s nice dear. Now get cleaned up, it’s almost supper time.”

  The Following Day - Tuesday June 28th

  A heavy clap of thunder woke Ziggy Two Step from a deep sound sleep. Ziggy had been up

  until 2 AM leaving a trail of cookie crumbs all through the Internet. After having a delicious

  meal of roast chicken with his family the night before, he had retired to his room to spend a

  relaxing evening on his computer after his first day of work. He started to surf websites

  devoted to historical events but soon found himself down the dark alleyways of Cyberspace

  where all the porn sites are. His intention was to go to bed early, at least by 10 PM so he

  could be sharp for his second day of work but the naked babes on his screen kept him up so to

  speak, a lot longer than he planned.

  Looking at his alarm clock, Ziggy saw that 7 AM had come and gone. “This was going to be a

  bad day”, Two Step thought to himself. It was bad enough being tired still, but the weather

  looked as though it was not going to be friendly to a courier today - especially one who

  couriers letters and packages on a bicycle.

  His shift was to start at 8 AM, so Ziggy had to drag himself out of bed, take a quick shower

  and then go on down to the kitchen to prepare himself a fast breakfast. A large bowl of corn

  flakes with bananas and a cup of coffee was going to have to do and should take care of him

  until lunchtime. Then a stop at Burger King to recharge for his anticipated busy afternoon.

  Arriving at work three minutes before he was due, Ziggy checked his bin to see he had eleven

  letters and four packages to deliver before his morning break. That shouldn’t be a problem

  because he didn’t take his break for another two hours.

  His first delivery was a box of shoe samples for Sam’s Shoe Shoppe on the outskirts of City

  Central. On his bicycle he hopped, and wheeled on over in less than four minutes. Got a

  signature for the package and was encouraged that it might not be a bad day after all. A little

  bit of rain was coming down off and on but his raingear was adequately protecting him. Now

  for two deliveries at the Riverton Professional Centre, a block and a half away.

  Then the troubles started. A big flash of lightning lit up the sky followed by a tremendous roar

  and soon after, the rain poured down in such a way that Noah himself would have been

  praying to his Maker. Maybe it wasn’t going to be such a good day after all.

  Come rain or shine, hell or high water, a courier’s duty could not be delayed. Ziggy started

  toward the RPC but had to stop at one of the few intersections in town because of the red

  light. Stopping for a red light was not really a big deal unless you were sitting there giving a

  new meaning to “a drowning rat”. No, today was not turning into a good day!!!

  This nasty weather was going to slow Ziggy down. Finally he made it
to the Professional

  Centre five minutes later than he would have liked. The first letter to Henry Highbottle of

  Highbottle Music was on the third floor and Ziggy ran past the elevator and two-stepped it up

  the staircase. Two Step was not one to bother with elevators because he was faster than they

  were and he didn’t like to be in a closed-in space. Besides, one of the elevators was out of

  service and the other was on the sixth floor.

  Damn, the door was locked. There was a sign on the door saying someone would be back at 11

  o’clock. Rats. So Ziggy had to abort that delivery and move on to the small package in his

  courier bag. When he brought it out, it started to make a ticking sound and Two Step started

  to panic ... but then he remembered that when he packed his deliveries, there was a package

  addressed to Cosmic Clocks on the sixth floor. Phew!!! Two-stepping it up three more flights

  of stairs, he arrived at their office, made his delivery and hurried back down to the first floor

  as fast as he could, to make up for lost time.

  As he got on his bike, he heard another roar. “More thunder”, thought Ziggy. Little did he

  realize that there was an explosion on the 6th floor inside the repair shop of Cosmic Clocks.

  Turning left on Maple Avenue, Ziggy drove out of City Central and headed towards the City

  Dump which was on the outskirts of town. As he approached the compound, he had to zig and

  zag a few times to avoid some of the residents living nearby. The rats were never pleased to

  have outsiders visiting them.

  The Riverton rat population had decreased by five before Ziggy successfully delivered the pay

  cheques to Refuse Inc. He had felt some bumps along the way but figured the dirt road was

  just a bit too rough.

  He was now fifty-five minutes into his workday so he was far from tired but he was soaked to

  the skin. So much for Jungle Jim’s Rain Gear being the best in the world! “Have to hurry

  home and get a dry set of clothes first chance I get”, Ziggy said to himself… but that time

  wasn’t now. Only ten minutes to deliver his next item to Penny’s Parrots.

  The package had a big yellow label attached to it indicating that it was “Urgent“. It was

  parrot feed that Penny had ordered three days ago as her parrots were literally starving to

  death. The supplier couldn’t ship it until the night before as they had run out of stock.

  Luckily for Ziggy, he was only a half-mile away and made it in under seven minutes despite

  the road construction and pouring rain. As he pulled up, he noticed that the town undertaker

  had his hearse parked there.

  “Wow”!… this was going to save Two Step some time because he was able to give the hearse

  driver the three letters for Fred’s Funeral Home. Had he arrived just a few moments earlier,

  he would have seen the driver loading the hearse with four small coffins.

  Upon entering her store, Penny was in tears but did seem to cheer up when she saw him.

  “Thank God”, she said to Ziggy. “I never thought you would get here in time. You saved my

  life. You saved my parrots’ lives”. She failed to mention though, that four of them hadn’t

  made it. The twenty parrots left would survive and she was grateful for that. She signed for

  the parcel and gave Two Step a $20 tip which surprised the heck out of him. Just his second

  day on the job, and he gets his first tip and twenty bucks at that! It’s going to be a good day

  after all!

  The last seven deliveries were made without a hitch except for the soaking of one Angus

  McTavish, the only Scotsman in town who drank too much scotch. Ziggy was peddling hard so

  he could gain a few minutes to run home and didn’t notice the large puddles he was driving

  through. He was so wet that he was unaware that his ankles were getting wetter by the

  minute.

  Since Ziggy had finished twenty minutes before his official break, he was able to make a fast

  detour home and change into some dry clothes. Thankfully, it looked like the storm had

  passed so all he needed was socks, a pair of jeans, a T-shirt and sneaks. No underwear - Ziggy

  liked to dress commando-style.

  He even had time to watch a little bit of news while he made himself a cup of coffee. He’d be

  back at the office in time to get his second batch of deliveries. Sally King, the news anchor,

  was mentioning about an explosion in the Riverton Professional Centre earlier this morning.

  The police had received a call from someone claiming responsibility for it saying it was in

  retaliation for a poor repair job made to an antique clock.

  One dead at the scene and four with life-threatening injuries.

  “I’m a lucky man”, thought Ziggy. “To think I was there this morning too. I could have been

  hurt. You never know when your number’s up”. Ziggy had completely forgotten about the

  package he delivered to Cosmic Clocks.

  A Busy Day for the Riverton Police

  Meanwhile, the Riverton Police had been busy. With two car accidents, a mugging and dozens

  of fugitive chickens yesterday, and now an explosion within City Central, Chief Ulysses Grant

  was being pushed by Mayor Reynolds for answers. Detectives were interviewing people who

  might have witnessed any of the events.

  The many reports prepared by the Riverton detectives gave them very little hope of

  recreating the events or solving the crimes committed. The only thing consistent in all the

  reports was that many people had seen a man on a bicycle speeding in the areas just

  moments before. Some said he wore a red bicycle helmet, others said blue and one witness

  even said she thought he was wearing a football helmet.

  Nobody seemed to agree on anything except for the speeding bicycle. All constables were told

  to keep an eye out for any speeding bicyclists in town. This was especially easy for Officer

  Jack Taylor, known to all town folk as “One-Eyed Jack” because of having lost an eye while

  serving overseas in Vietnam.

  Channel 8 was continuously reminding its citizens to also be vigilant for anybody speeding on

  a bike. There was hardly anyone in town who wasn’t talking about events of the last day or

  so. Riverton had, up until then, been one of the quietest towns in Montana. In fact the last

  serious car accident had been over a year ago and it was nearly three years since the last

  mugging. Some of the more paranoid members of town were even starting to speak of the end

  of the world. Such were the conditions in Riverton on that June 28th morning.

  Wung Chou

  Wung Chou, the senior member of 5 Minute Courier’s Bicycle Corps, never went to work

  without his Sanyo Walkman. As he weaved in and out of the traffic, he always listened to

  classic rock on WRPU 94.5 on the FM dial. Usually it was non-stop rock but today they were

  interrupting the music to update citizens of what was going on around town. He heard what

  some of the witnesses had reported and was relieved that he never wore a bicycle helmet,

  although it was the law. However, he was sure that Ziggy did wear a helmet but couldn’t

  remember the color of it. After all, Two Step had only started work with him the day before.

  Wung had been the owner of a Martial Arts Studio but gave it up in his early fifties when his

  students where giving him more bruises than he was giving them. He was going to retire and

  catch up on his oil painting bu
t after a few years became restless, so he went back to work.

  Today, at age 70, he was the oldest bicyclist in town.

  Everyone liked Wung. Well, almost everyone. Like all small towns, there was a racist group

  who figured if you weren’t white - it wasn’t right. They complained to town council that

  Wung was a menace and it was rumoured that he was responsible for half the Chinese

  population that lived in the area known as Tiny Peking. They wanted Wung to be sent back

  whence he came. The problem was that he was born and brought up in Wet Grass, a village

  just 20 miles west of town. The other thing was that Wung could only speak about 10 words of

  Cantonese and had obtained a Masters Degree in English.

  Twice today he was pulled over by the police but once they realized who he was, they just

  told him to slow down a bit and wear a helmet, then allowed him to go on his way. He eased

  his speed a tad but time is money after all and Wung was on a rushed schedule.

  Wung had just delivered a letter to the accounting firm of Hoskin and Smith when his cell

  phone vibrated.

  “Lucy here”, came the voice from his office. “Your nephew Sung Ho is in the hospital. He was

  hurt in the explosion over at the RPC. You’d better get your ass over there”.

  “Oh my, yes, I am on my way. Bye”.

  That was his next delivery anyway. He had medical supplies to drop off at the front desk.

  Looking somewhat worried, with good reason, he asked where he could find Sung Ho. He was

  told Sung was still in surgery but was expected to be out very soon. Wung still had some

  parcels to deliver but he was in no shape to do so. Nor did he want to leave the hospital

  without being sure that his nephew would be okay. He called Ziggy who agreed to swing by

  and pick up Wung’s deliveries.

  Ziggy Returns to Work

  Now in dry clothes and with the weather improving, Ziggy finished his morning break and sped

  down to Jefferson Hospital to pick up Wung’s courier bag. It was going to be a busy day -

  maybe not such a good day after all. Combining the two courier bags, and after sorting them

  in such a way that he wouldn’t have to double back, Two Step headed for Barney’s Bowling

  Alley, about five minutes from the hospital. Barney’s was located at the top of Cliffside Lane,

  the steepest street in town. Why it was called a lane nobody knew - it was a four lane

  highway a mile and a half long.